Friday, July 16, 2010

Obamas in Maine, and a Really Bad Idea

The Obamas are in Maine, enjoying a weekend in Acadia, which is a great place to be. (I recommend the Jordan Pond House for popovers). And Mainers are understandably excited, but:

Rep. Chellie Pingree, the congresswoman from Maine’s 1st District, said in a statement, “I think the Obamas will really enjoy the quiet woods, beautiful coast, wonderful people and everything else that brings thousands of families here every year.” She also shared with her opinion on Maine’s Coast 93.1 radio Thursday that the Obamas should try two drinks during their stay: Moxie soda and Allen’s coffee flavored brandy.

Moxie, sure, everybody should try it once. Most people hate it - it's kinda like Campari-flavored root beer.

But Allen's Coffee Brandy? Bad idea.

The champagne of Maine, aka "fat ass in a glass", aka "gorilla milk", aka "liquid leg spreader"? "Cited by 59 percent of those seeking substance-abuse treatment" in Maine?

The biggest selling liquor in Maine is the half-gallon bottle of Allen's. The second biggest selling liquor in Maine is the liter bottle of Allen's.

In 2003, a woman from Penobscot dug up the ashes of her boyfriend, then later explained, "I never would have done that if I hadn't been drinking Allen's," according to a report from the time. A year before, a man from Bangor had been discovered asleep in a stranger's bed wearing stolen pink underwear; he explained later that he had consumed a half-gallon of brandy.

We don't want the leader of the free world padding around the White House in his bathrobe sipping sombreros out of an old Dunkin Donuts to-go cup. Better he should have a nice cold Geary's Hampshire Ale if he wants a real, safe taste of Maine.

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